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Dear Senior Ndidi: The Senior Who Taught Me How to Be One

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All through my years in school, be it my nursery, primary or secondary, I had a lot of seniors, but I only had 2 truly unique ones throughout my school years. The first was Tony (I will tell you about him another day), and the second was Ndidi. You see, Ndidi was a special senior to me. We never really chatted for longer than 5 minutes while I was in school, but those 1-to-2-minute conversations meant a lot to my 12-year-old self. Ndidi was always smiling; I never saw him frown or look sad, and that was a nice thing to me because I liked people who smiled, it was, and is still, a welcoming gesture to me. Another thing I liked about Senior Ndidi was that his smile was not just welcoming, but beautiful. He had this very wide smile, which was more beautiful because he had a good dentition. I think this is where I developed a dentition fetish, but that’s beside the point. Also, my wonderful senior was dark-skinned and very tall. I realized very early in my life that I liked tall people,the...
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I AM SO MUCH MORE...

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Do you know what it feels like going through life and not knowing that you are so much more than you know? Well, I just realized it. A few minutes ago, a song triggered all my emotions, because it made me realize that I have been hiding in a shell all my life. It brought to my attention that I am running out of time, that I am perfect, and that I am very insecure. It is crazy that I have been crying for hours because I just realized I have been short-changing myself in everything, be it my school work, grades, relationships, or even within my family. The craziest part is that I did it to myself.  It is even more unbelievable because, despite the thousand cheerleaders that surround me, I was lacking the greatest cheerleader a person could ever need, and that's myself. I have never really been my cheerleader, and it just dawned on me. The level of damage I have done is a lot, and I have to clean my mess before it is too late. This is too much to believe, but I am thankful...
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Till We Meet Again...

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I lost a dear friend today, and it hurts too much. When you lose someone, no matter how good or bad your relationship was with the person, there is this feeling of loss, whether you want to accept it or not. The feeling is more intense when you have to witness life gradually drain out slowly from that person. It hurts like a bitch when an energetic person filled with life, love and laughter is drained of all that goodness slowly and painfully.  It is annoying because you keep remembering how vibrant the person was, as against their present state. It is frustrating when you know there is nothing you can do about it. You feel useless when all your resources don't help the person, and you have to rely on fate and life to decide whether the person lives or dies. Life, the determinant of the person's fate, has a funny, unexpected, unwanted way of surprising us; especially when the surprise is not funny. Life is indeed unkind and unfair at times. Hoping for your loved one...
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I AM NOT...

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I am not your friend. I am not your age mate. I am not your family member. I am not your church member. I am not your girlfriend/boyfriend. I am not feminine/masculine. I am not childish. I am not on your level. I am not your helper. I am not your enemy. I am not a fake person. I am not a deceitful person. I am not a mean person. I am not a tactless person. I am not a nice person. Why do we have to state a fact that we say is obvious? Why do we waste our time talking about what we are not when we can invest our quality time in talking about what and who we truly are? (not in a proud manner) What do we expect these statements to do? Why do we believe that this “I am not” statement is necessary for our lives? Why don’t we like to talk about ourselves and others in a positive light? This “I am not” culture has affected some people to the extent that, in cases where they are to describe themselves, they will tell you one thousand (1,000) things they are not, but cannot tell yo...
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Qudos to the D...

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A big shout out, and thank you to the Ds out there, who have what it takes, know how to use it; and have good character to back what they have. Different types of Ds exist, apart from the size, colour, height, age and so on; I group the Ds into three (4) groups, which are: M, R, PD, and the N group. To the M group (aka Messi group), they are naturally gifted, and we thank them very much for that. They are Ds who use what they have very well and are natural at using it to give utmost pleasure or satisfaction. To the R group (aka Ronaldo group), who train very hard and become great at it, thank you very much. Your dedication and consistency are appreciated. To the PD group (Plain Ducks group), who are not naturally good or own as much skillset as the R group, thank you very much for using what you have to help us.  I have met different Ds in my life, some have been good, some bad, thinking about the bad ones is making me angry. To the good ones out there, thank you for be...
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Being INEM...

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Today is dedicated to my friend, Inem. You see Inem is this guy that dislikes my taste in music and doesn't appreciate my food combination, but I forgive him because he doesn't know what he is missing. This is by the way, so, the reason I am writing this is to appreciate Inem, my dear friend. Before I appreciate Inem, let me tell you how we met. I met Inem (please forgive me, but I like the sound of his name, so I will write it many times, and also so he can know this is about him) at film school. I have no idea how we started talking, but I am sure he threw a jab my way, and I threw a jab back. We started talking, but took a mini-break, as Mr Inem thought I was snubbing him. We picked up our conversation and it wasn't bad. I guess he must have forgiven me (what a nice fellow). Anyways, Inem and I spoke more after film school. How that happened, I have never known, but meeting him and a few unnamed others is a blessing I gained from film school. Since then, we h...
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I Know What I Want...

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I know what I want, I want to be a doctor. I want to be a lawyer. I want to be an accountant. I want to be a dancer. I want to be a singer. I want to be a game developer. I know what I want, I want to get married at 25. I want 3 children. I want 2 boys and 1 girl. I want 3 boys. I want to be a grandparent at 50. I want to celebrate my 30th wedding anniversary in Seychelles. I know what I want, I want no degree. I want 1 degree. I want 2 degrees before 27. I want a Masters' degree before 29. I want a PhD before 35. I want to be a Professor before 40. Kudos to all who know what they want. It is a rare talent to know what you want. It is a greater talent to get what you want. It is the greatest reward to enjoy what you want. It is wonderful when your wants make you happy. But, what if I don't know what I want? What if I don't know my talent? What if I don't know what I like? What if I don't know what I want to become? What if I don't know if I want to get married? ...
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